What is Kung Fu, really?

A disappointing discovery

I came across a Kung Fu instructor's YouTube account while browsing the Internet. He had sparring and form videos posted. But what caught my attention wasn't the videos, it was his comments:
Few people in traditional kong-fu willing to recognize the truth that they don't know how to fight and that is why real kong fu is lost and be humiliated by other styles. If you do practice kong fu, then you have to do sparring, you have to use all your strength and exhaust yourself to learn the limits of your system and your own body and mind. There is no way around if you do want be a real master.
and
I am so tired of watching WuShu, it's okay if a dancing style wants to adopt some martial art moves but it is ridiculous for a dancing style to call itself a martial art. Not even mention those crazy shouting and meaningless hand waving moves.
As a passionate student of martial arts, I read this and was disappointed. It suggests the true meaning of martial arts (specifically referred to as kung fu here) is fighting. This is the origin of martial arts, hence the name, but it is far from the 'true' meaning.

Strictly speaking, kung fu…

If you look up kung fu (功夫) from Chinese to English, you'll find something consistent with the Wikipedia article on Chinese Martial Arts:
In Chinese, kung fu can also be used in contexts completely unrelated to martial arts, and refers colloquially to any individual accomplishment or skill cultivated through long and hard work.[1] Wushu is a more precise term for general martial activities.
Kung fu generally refers to a skill that takes a long time to develop. So, a chef could have excellent kung fu. He'd be a fantastic chef, and perhaps a terrible fighter. Likewise, a dancer could have great kung fu.

The term wushu (武術) means martial arts, literally. However, if you hear someone say they practice Wushu today, it typically means Modern Wushu from China. Modern Wushu evolved from traditional martial arts and is designed for competitions where participants are judged on their ability to do a form. The forms can be extremely gymnastic as well as impractical when it comes to fighting. Essentially, Modern Wushu is a martial arts style that has adopted more gymnastic movements. Not a dancing style that has adopted moves from the martial arts, as the YouTube teacher claims. That doesn't change the fact that Modern Wushu masters train with all their strength and exhaust themselves to the limits of their body and mind, year in and year out. They, without a doubt, train kung fu.

Aside from the technicalities

If I stumbled upon a few silly errors with naming nuances in this teacher's comments, I wouldn't be writing this. These things are trivial, although I would've expected a native speaker of Chinese and a student of martial arts to be familiar with them. The problem lies in the point, what is the real meaning behind martial arts? Forget about what you call it, Karate, Kung Fu, Wushu, Taekwon Do, and so on. They are all different paths to a similar goal.
Asking the 'true' meaning of martial arts is like asking the true meaning of life: the answer is decided by the artist. It could be to fight, or to dance. It could be to keep yourself in shape so that it's easier to meet girls. It could be anything and it wouldn't be wrong. But, I argue there is a deeper meaning that those who train long and hard realize.
When someone speaks the words kung fu, one of the first images that comes to mind is a Shaolin Monk. Despite sparse instances in Chinese history where Shaolin Monks were involved in battles, why else would they devote themselves to martial arts? Why would their training include anything but practical self defense techniques? The quoted teacher above is training and teaching martial arts heavily influenced by Shaolin (including Hung Gar – 洪家拳).

What are our masters teaching us?

The most respected masters I've trained under taught martial arts as a way of life. Self defense was included in some schools more than others, but it was never the primary focus. The truth is, physical self defense is a tiny part of what martial arts really has to offer.
I had a strict Karate instructor and I was fond of him for that reason. He wasn't afraid to use some power when sparring with me, even when I was inexperienced. When asked if he had ever used Karate for self defense, he replied that he had. Two times. And he instantly regretted it afterwards both times.

Imagine if he had trained for no other reason than to develop those skills. He would've had nothing but regret for so much time spent training. That wasn't the case, he continued training after these events. He developed and rose above his former self.
Gichin Funakoshi is known as the "Father of Modern Karate." He wrote his autobiography, Karate-Do: My Way of Life. In it (perhaps in the prologue, I'm not sure) it mentions how he also used Karate for self defense just two times in his life. Just like my aforementioned Karate instructor, he deeply regretted it immediately afterwards.
The list goes on. I would argue one of the major themes behind Jet Li's Fearless is that martial arts are not about fighting.

If you still don't believe me

Traditional martial arts are ambiguous. I trained with a Karate student preparing for a black belt promotional that never thought the basic blocking drills in Karate were anything more than blocks. The entire moves, when executed in full, are actually terrible blocks. But they work great for breaking someone's grip on your arms or body. Now he learned those moves as a white belt and trained for over 4 years, and at a good school. It's not his fault. Martial arts are ambiguous for a reason.
As a teacher, you may have strong morals and principals. The last thing you'd want is for your students to go out and get into fights everywhere. But you want them to learn martial arts and you believe it has something to offer them. By teaching them more ambiguous techniques, you're able to pass on the truly valuable aspects of martial arts while omitting a large portion of the deadly parts.

The point is

The true meaning behind martial arts is not fighting. So what is it?

As silly and cliché as this is, especially when talking about martial arts, it's a fantastic way to represent the true meaning of martial arts. The yin-yang symbol represents balance. Mind and body. Harmony. Training martial arts exercises your body, but not without making you think. Working hard and training kung fu of any kind develops character. It helps us to learn more about ourselves and others. It teaches you discipline and confidence; the very skills you need to be a better member of society. It helps you be more balanced. Balance is the key to a better life, as well as a better society.

The problem is

The world of kung fu and martial arts has too many people who get distracted by other things like fighting and sparring. Sparring is nothing like fighting, for starters. Fighting is a life and death situation, sparring is a game. It can be helpful in training kung fu, but it is not necessary. The world of martial arts needs more teachers that realize this. The alternative would be a loss.